The reality of Maryland’s move to the Big 10 is it’s a really great move for them. They’ll make gobs of money. They’ll play bigger programs and probably be on TV more. And on and on. However, after yesterday, the biggest advantage they might have is not having to travel to Tallahassee, Florida anymore. Roget could not put together a thesaurus large enough to handle all the words to describe that game. Bludgeoning; Reckoning; Destruction; Demoralization; Emasculation; pick one. When I queried Siri about it, she returned the phrase “Vanquished.” But that’s not strong enough. What we witnessed yesterday was, to put it in North Florida terms, “An A** Whoopin’.”

Maryland came in high on hope. High on confidence. They had discharged of their first four opponents and the dreaded “Upset Special” was being discussed. They had weapons on offense (and they do). They had a stingy, opportunistic and physical defense (and they do). They were going to be the team that FSU hadn’t seen yet: competitive, strong, fast, “good.” All these things were going to finally challenge the mighty ‘Noles, who looked so bad defensively against a mediocre Boston College team. They couldn’t stop anyone running the ball and they certainly had not faced anyone like Stefon Diggs all season (we had, his name was Devin Street and his buddy’s name was Tyler Boyd). Jameis Winston had not faced the pressure that was going to be thrown at him. Randy Edsall had this team in the top 25 and was rocketing up the list of darlings to make a challenge in the conference.

Well. After 9 touchdowns, 600+ yards of offense and a complete shutting down of any offense they had to offer (including knocking out their starting QB), Maryland was left in a heap, wondering what had just happened to them and where they stood in the grand scheme of things. They ran into an absolute buzzsaw; a near perfect game in all aspects by Florida State, who showed the college football world what is possible when they play to their potential. 63-0. A dynasty-level beatdown.

Good

Jameis: Continues his seat upon the top of this column. 5 touchdowns. 393 yards passing. 90.5 QBR rating (joins Kellen Moore as the only QB to start his first 5 career games with a QBR over 75. 50 is average). He continues to throw darts, read the field well, and run the offense, not just as a “manager,” but as a leader mature enough to call plays and make the right call most of the time. His escapability continues to impress. His pocket presence is unreal. He’s patient under pressure. It just continues to be stupid. If you watch the game again, don’t just pay attention to his escape of a sure-fire sack. Look at the throw at the end of that play. It was very literally the only place he could put it. And the catch by O’Leary was major league. Just so impressive. Also, his throw to Shaw was unreal. Running, opposite of natural, squares up, delivers a dart.

O-Line: The pass protection yesterday was unreal. Jameis had time all day. So much that sometimes he waited too long. The amount of pressure that Maryland was bringing goes unnoticed because Trickett’s boys were phenomenal in their assignments. Run blocking was good, too. Seeing guys getting to the second level, making perfect combo blocks (even O’Leary) is a thing of beauty. Bottom line is we controlled the line of scrimmage and keep doing so each game. The short yardage situations get me real excited. It’s nice to know we can power up and get things done again.

Singularly, I’d like to point out Alex Barron, who did a fantasic job coming in for the injured Bryan Stork, who left with a concussion. Didn’t miss a beat. Good on you, young man.

Conversions: 6-11 on 3rd down. Many of those on long situations. 33 first downs altogether. That’s just silliness. Our efficiency is unreal.

Receivers: Seriously, this is unfair. The improvement and contribution of these guys is so big. Teams very literally can’t cover them all. It’s impossible. Rashad is a game changer. Benjamin is not coverable one-on-one (and big fella, watch the film of your blocking yesterday. You made things happen). Christian Greene is getting in the mix and making some pretty nice catches. Shaw is proving to be one of the best slot receivers we’ve had in a decade or more (and how about the moves!). We’ve had a drought of NFL-level receivers. We have at least 3 on the field at most times every game. Great job by Dawsey getting these guys in form.

Defense: 234 total yards. Total. That’s a shutdown. 201 total passing for about 6.3 per pass. 43 total yards rushing for a whopping 1.3 per rush. Overall, we allowed about 4.1 yards per play total on 57 plays. That’s ridiculous, given what that offense can do and some of the personnel they have. What was the difference this week? Discipline. Playing within the scheme and not trying to make ESPN each play. Gap discipline, not overpursuing, being patient. This defense can be the best in the country. I hope after yesterday they realized how they be so. Just a fantastic team defensive effort. Congratulations to Jeremy Pruitt for his first Spiked Baseball performance.

Singularly, Lamarcus Joyner has to be pointed out here. They lined Diggs up in the slot and Joyner covered him all day. Also want to point out Terrance Smith. Thought he played a hell of a game.

And let’s just talk about “the hit,” shall we. It was a late hit. However, it wasn’t a crown of the helmet hit. It wasn’t “dirty.” He led with his shoulder, hit him in the chest. Yes, he got his jaw jacked, but that was a legal hit. Can we stop discussing?

Aguayo: continues setting the record for first-year kickers. Kickoffs were solid, much better than last week.

Beatty: I’m going to put him here for his hangtime improvement. He was really giving our guys opportunity get get down the field. Still not long, but he was putting it up and not outkicking coverage.

Bad

CJ Brown: I feel for this kid. Two trips to Tallahassee, two injuries after getting nailed. He will be happy to never come here again.

Students: Guys, I know it’s noon. I do. I get it. But it’s a top 25 matchup. Get there before the second quarter, please. And if you could stay at least through the end of the third, that’d be cool. Rubbed me wrong yesterday.

On our end, what the hell are you wanting me to put for Bad? Seriously.

Ugly

There was nothing ugly about anything in our game yesterday. Outside of the score, I guess.

So where are we after this? We’re 5-0, 2-0 in conference. We just introduced this team to the CFB world if we hadn’t already. We showed we are a complete team, perhaps the most complete in the country. We have a legitimate Heisman contender (I’m not afraid in any way to say that). We have a defense that is dominant when it plays to its potential. It’s also learning how to play within this scheme (a scheme that has a gajillion looks). We have an offense with more weapons than Grand Theft Auto. And we use them. We have our biggest test coming up and it looks to be as big a stage as one could ask for. Win this game, control your destiny for the ultimate goal. Win this game, put yourself in the position to be great. Win this game and put the nation on notice that you are, indeed, back to form. No pressure, though

As for Maryland. Enjoy the benefits of the Big 10. I’m sure they’ll be great. But let yesterday serve as the message we; as a team and as a conference; have for you: “Don’t let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya.”

Now, here kitty kitty kitty…

Clemson – Florida State…Get Ready